5 Reasons Why Traditions Are Important for Families

I loved taking my kids camping when they were young. Loading up the truck and heading out to a lake somewhere gave us plenty of nice peaceful memories over the years. The one that everyone remembers when we get together, however, is one trip while we were out on the lake, a small squall quickly developed. We dashed to our campsite hoping to not get drenched along the way.

When we reached our tent and towels, we were safe and dry but very hungry. That’s when we realized we had left a 4-pound catfish my daughter caught sitting on the fire back by the water! It was most certainly destroyed by the storm that followed. We ate instant oatmeal for dinner and laughed about that poor catfish for the next 25 years.

My wife’s family were not avid campers growing up. Her daughters mostly laugh about how awful everyone felt during the one family camping trip they took. Their father was not a fan of sleeping on the ground, the food did not agree with my wife at all, and the big hair, early 90’s spandex shorts, and Hypercolor shirts made for colorful and ridicule-worthy family photos.

Perhaps taking an evening walk under the full moon or decorating the house for Halloween gives you the warm and fuzzies. A Daddy/Daughter date once a month could be as simple as breakfast and a trip to the carwash. However, it’s in those small moments that deep trust and emotional connection are built in your relationship. In 20 years, your child will remember those informal traditions very fondly.

I started baking cookies with my kids when they were very young. Even if they were too young to measure ingredients, they could still help stir everything together or spoon the dough onto the baking sheet. It may have been messy at times, but it was enjoyed by all of us.

My mother was an excellent baker and passing on her skills and knowledge to my own kids felt especially satisfying. When we were able to bake with all three generations at the same time, those were certainly the best-tasting creations ever.

Finding ways to incorporate multiple generations into your traditions is a tremendous gift to everyone involved. Older ones can teach the younger ones, people feel needed, important, and relevant.

A few multi-generation traditions include:

• Holiday Celebrations: Annual gatherings for holidays where recipes, stories, and customs are shared and enjoyed together.
• Family Reunions: Reconnecting with extended family, and sharing updates, stories, and memories can be a beautiful thing. No one says you have to invite the entire family either. It’s perfectly okay to gather only the people who fill you up, not drain you.
• Cooking and Baking: Preparing traditional family recipes together, or regularly trying your hand at something new, either way, preparing food together is one of the oldest family traditions around.
• Storytelling Nights: Don’t let the summer campfire be the only place you share stories and memories. Memories and anecdotes from times gone by, especially those that highlight family legacy and value are always important.
• Outdoor Activities: Getting outside into a new environment presents its own set of challenges. Those challenges and overcoming them together can bond and create lasting memories. Maybe outside fun for you is spending the night under the stars. Maybe it’s taking a walk around the neighborhood with your toddler to look for your favorite neighborhood pets.  Maybe gardening or other home improvement work is more your speed.  All are valid and wonderful.
• Celebration of Life Events: Marking important milestones such as birthdays, graduations, or anniversaries are times when everyone can get together, nosh a bit, and reflect on all the steps it took to get to the current achievement.
• Cultural or Religious Practices: Engaging in rituals, ceremonies, or practices that reflect the family’s cultural or religious heritage, ensuring younger generations learn and appreciate their background.
• Game Nights: Regularly scheduled family game nights where everyone participates, fostering laughter and friendly competition.
• Volunteering Together: Participating in community service or charity work as a family, instills family values and gives back to the community.
• Memory Books or Scrapbooks: Creating and updating a memory album lets everyone contribute their stories, photos, and experiences. You no longer have to peel back the clear sheet from sticky pages just to make an album. Your new family tradition of making digital albums together still counts. 

Many of us already associate traditions with religious holiday practices. Some may fill you with joy while others may fill you with dread. In all cases, it’s important to periodically evaluate your traditions to see if they’re still worth the effort.

For those traditions that still hold value and bring meaning and/or joy to your life, make sure you talk about why. The reasons you do something are as important as the fact that you do it. A friend once shared with me a parable about dinner. It goes a little something like this:

A young child is making a brisket with her mother for the first time. She watches her mother prepare the meat and cut off the ends of the roast. The little girl thinks the meat is delicious , but asks ” Mommy, why do you cut off the ends? Dady says that’s the best part!” Her mother replies, “That’s the way my mom always did it.”

A few weeks later, they go to grandma’s house, and she prepares the same beloved brisket, cutting off the ends as usual. The child is still confused why anyone would get rid of the delicious end pieces, so she askes her grandma why she cut off the ends. Grandma says, “Honey, that’s the only way it will fit in the pan!”

Don’t let future generations waste the brisket, friends. 

Pause for a moment and think about the things you, your children, and your siblings talk about when you get together—it’s the shared memories and stories you created together. Yes, they are often the stories of epic fails, the burnt holiday turkey, or the time little Teddy shouted the F-word in front of the whole family when he tripped over grandma’s mobility scooter.

That’s the good stuff in life. The family card games, the time Uncle Joe started snoring during the sermon, the weird girlfriend your cousin brought to the daughter’s dance recital…these are the stories that make up the most cherished memories of life.

When we provide opportunities for things to happen and then talk about them for years to come we feel the joy and security that people witnessed our lives, that we belonged, and that we were loved.

Make time to have that discussion with your family. You’ll find it to be a great one, full of surprises from your kids and with many opportunities to strengthen family ties, which is a good way to sum up our five reasons why traditions are important.

A tradition we want to see started in our family, is to set aside one week a year where everyone comes together. With our blended family of 5 children and 13 grandchildren who live beyond the four corners of the US and overseas, it’s hard to get everyone together.

We make it a point to see them regularly. Visiting one family at a time is great, but it’s amazing when we’re all together, especially when four generations come together. So, that’s what’s on our wish list this year, a new family tradition.