4 Easy Steps for Sharing Responsibility at Home

Sharing responsibility at home for the spaces everyone shares will make your life much easier and teach your kids an important life skill. So, if you spend time each night picking up after your kids, keep reading.

It doesn’t have to be hard to implement sharing responsibility at home, especially if you start when your kids are young.

It can be as simple as letting your young child know that one activity needs to be put away before another can be started, especially when the playing takes place in a family space (such as the living room).

When kids participate in household tasks, they’re not just helping out—they’re developing crucial life skills that will serve them well into adulthood. Research from Harvard University shows that children who do chores become more empathetic adults and are better at working with others. Plus, sharing responsibility at home creates a sense of teamwork and belonging that strengthens family bonds.

The key is starting small and building gradually. Even toddlers can put toys in bins or help sort laundry by colors. As children grow, their capacity for sharing responsibility at home naturally increases, making it easier to add more complex tasks to their routine.

First, your family will need to go over why a family space is the family team’s responsibility. When everyone uses something, it’s everyone’s responsibility to take care of it. What does that mean, though?

As a family, you’ll need to decide what it means to take care of a family space together.

• Does everyone just clean up after themselves?
• What about vacuuming or dusting or other things that need to be done to keep the entire area clean?
• Are these things split up among family members? Do they rotate through the family? Figure out the tasks that need to be done to keep the space clean and which family members are capable of completing those tasks. Then decide as a family how to divvy them up. Don’t forget to decide how often each task should be done (e.g., daily, once a week or on a certain day, every other week).
• Are there other rooms the family will be sharing responsibility for? If so, list what they are and go back to step 2 for each additional room.
• How will tasks be kept track of? Will there be a chart somewhere? And what happens if a task isn’t done (e.g., no playing until the task is completed)?

Once your plan is in place for sharing responsibility at home, give it time to see how well it works. Experts say it can take anywhere from 18 to 254 days to form a new habit, so be patient with yourself and your kids.

When issues come up, as they always do, address them at your next family meeting and discuss different options until everyone agrees on a solution. This collaborative approach reinforces that sharing responsibility at home is truly a team effort, not something parents force on their kids.

Do tasks or responsibilities need to be changed to resolve the issue? If so, update your list. Continue to talk openly with your kids and spouse and make changes as needed.

Different ages call for different approaches. Preschoolers might start with simple tasks like putting shoes away or feeding pets. Elementary school kids can tackle bigger jobs like loading the dishwasher or organizing their backpacks. Teenagers can handle complex responsibilities like meal planning or managing family schedules.

The beauty of sharing responsibility at home is that it grows with your family. What starts as simple toy cleanup evolves into a comprehensive system where everyone contributes to keeping your home running smoothly—and everyone feels proud of their role in making it happen.