Talking about Traditions: 1 Simple Way to Bond

Talking about traditions can be a great way to bond as a family. With the holiday season quickly approaching, now would be a great time to talk about the traditions your family celebrates.

Take some time to think about the traditions you celebrate as a family. Then think back to the ones you celebrated when you were a child.

Were there family traditions that you would have happily passed on? As an adult, have you purposefully put an end to those traditions? Or maybe there were traditions you enjoyed, but you decided not to continue them for another reason. What about the ones you looked forward to every year? Do you celebrate those traditions with your kids now?

For example, when I was a kid, my family would travel to one of the grandparents’ houses every year. Granted, I didn’t enjoy the car ride and sitting in traffic for hours on end, but once we were there, I loved seeing my grandparents, aunts, and uncles and running around with all the cousins.

Even though I enjoyed seeing everyone for the holidays, this is a tradition that my husband and I have decided not to continue with our own kids. Although it would be great to see family, we decided we didn’t want the holidays to be filled with travel.

Another tradition I did every year was look at Christmas lights. I remember going through one neighborhood where every single house was lit up, and the streets were lined with cars inching along. I loved seeing all the lights and decorations. This is something I continue to enjoy, so I have continued the tradition with my kids.

Once you’ve had a chance to think about the traditions you stopped doing and the ones you continued with your own family, talk with your family about the traditions you celebrate together. This is something you can bring up at your next family meeting or the next time the family is all together.

You can start by sharing a memory you have from one of the traditions you celebrated as a child. Let your family know what you liked or didn’t like about it, and share why you decided to keep the tradition alive in your own family or why you chose not to continue it.

Then ask your kids if there’s a tradition the family celebrates that they like and look forward to. You can also see if they’d like to share about a tradition they’d like to change or aren’t that fond of.

Maybe sharing why you celebrate the tradition will help your kids see it in a new light and enjoy it a bit more. If not, that’s okay. They’ll at least know why it’s important to you.

For instance, I love looking at Christmas lights (as I mentioned above), but some years my kids aren’t feeling the same. Although I enjoy seeing the lights, it wouldn’t be fun for me if everyone else in the car wasn’t enjoying the experience and was grumpy.

We skip the excursion when this happens. I think there have only been a few years that we haven’t gone (and my oldest is a teen), and at least one of those years was because the roads were too icy.

Being willing to hear your kids out and asking for ongoing feedback is an important part of creating an atmosphere of open and honest communication in the house. It doesn’t mean you have to stop celebrating a tradition that is important to you.

Your kids can choose not to continue it when they’re an adult. It does mean that you’re willing to have a conversation with them and hear them out, though. Maybe there’s a way to change the tradition in some way to make it more enjoyable for everyone while still being celebrated. You’ll never know until you ask.